| Rhino | Hippo |
|---|---|
|
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| Wins 70.30% of 1k fights | Wins 29.70% of 1k fights |
Hippos and Rhinos are two of the biggest, baddest vegans on the planet. And, unlike your typical human vegan, they are packed with muscle and massive levels of aggression. Both beasts are top-tier threats, but who would walk out alive if the two big boys met in combat? Find out on this week's Fantasy Brawl: Big Back Edition.
A fully grown male Hippo can weigh up to 9,900 pounds and be as long as 16.5 feet from snout to tail. Rhinos, particularly the White variants, can tip the scales at 7,900 pounds and up to 13 feet in length. The Hippo is a bit shorter, standing at about 5 feet at the shoulder, whereas a Rhino can get up to 6 feet.
In summary, Hippos are shorter on average than Rhinos but are generally bulkier and longer. In most cases, the size advantage will go to the monstrous vegetarian, the not-so-humble Hippo. But does all that size equate to strength? Let's find out.
Hippos are indeed bigger on average, but it doesn't mean they are stronger than their horned counterparts. In fact, despite their lower weight class, Rhinos are actually much stronger than Hippos overall. Rhinos are built like massive monster trucks and move accordingly.
Their power is centered around their necks and shoulders, enabling them to charge at powerful speeds and flip large objects (or animals) with ease. Hippos, on the other hand, are strong enough to flip over boats and crocs, but their most powerful weapons are their jaws.
The Hippo has a bite force of up to 2,000 pounds per square inch, and they possess 20-inch tusks that are strong enough to pierce through boats. It is truly a frightening creature, but its overall power pales in comparison to the Rhino. Now, which of these animals is more likely to use its awesome strength to attack?
When it comes to aggression, you won't find an animal with a worse attitude than a Hippo. They are super territorial and often attack humans, lions, crocs, and other living and non-living things without provocation. They are truly tubby terrors that you would be wise not to cross paths with.
A Rhino is not a puppy by any means, but it is much less aggressive than a hippopotamus, and if it does attack you, chances are you probably had it coming. Rhinos are not overtly territorial or short-tempered, but they will defend themselves if they or their young are threatened (the same way you would).
So, if you run up on one with the intent of taking its horn as part of some weird ingredient list for a potion you're making, then you'll be on the receiving end of the nastiest tackle you've ever felt. Given that Rhinos are mostly rational beings, the aggression battle goes to the Hippo.
Both Hippos and Rhinos have very durable skin. Their hides are around 2 inches thick in most places. By comparison, human skin is only 0.06 inches thick. Hippo skin is impressive, but Rhinos have organic knight's armor covering most of their bodies.
The skin thickness is roughly the same at 2 inches, but the texture is much more durable and built to withstand impact. Hippo skin, while thick, isn't even strong enough to withstand sunlight for very long. This is why you constantly see them submerged or covered in mud. In terms of armor, the Rhino wins, but which one of these creatures has more brain power?
When you think of smart animals, neither one of these creatures is the first to come to mind. And, overall, in terms of intelligence in the animal kingdom, they aren't what most would consider smart or even of average intelligence. However, both creatures do possess large brains.
Their massive brains are proportionate to their large body mass. They also have well-developed hippocampi, which is the part of the brain associated with spatial a wareness and memory. Though neither would get admitted into Harvard, the Hippo, with its more complex social structure, is slightly smarter than its rival.
Hippos live in pods, in contrast to the solitary lifestyle of the rhino. These pods are structured similarly to a monarchy, with a dominant male reigning over the rest of the group. This alpha male has exclusive breeding rights to all the females, while the smaller, subordinate males are unable to breed. Adherence to such social structures requires a certain degree of intelligence and capacity to learn.
For this reason, the edge in the intelligence department goes to the hippos. Rhinos are smart enough to stick to the land, however. Given that they live in different habitats, how would a fight occur? Let's find out!
Rhinos and Hippos are both found in the same areas, so they could encounter each other. Their habitats are different, as the Hippo is going to hang around the water while Rhinos are going to be on land. But both creatures need to drink, so an encounter would be possible.
In Fantasy Brawls battle simulator, the Rhino is heading over to a lake for a drink and encounters a big bull hippopotamus who instantly chooses violence. Rhinos cannot swim at all, and if the water is too deep, they simply avoid it, so the battle will not be an aquatic one.
In our scenario, an angry male Hippo charges at a relatively peaceful Rhino who was simply trying to get a sip of water. Given the Rhino's poor eyesight, the Hippo lands the first blow. Now, the Rhino will likely shrug this blow off as its armor and muscle will prevent it from being knocked over.
The Hippo typically charges with its mouth wide open, but it's unlikely to get its teeth on the less plated areas of the Rhino given the way it would be positioned when drinking water. Its softer underbelly wouldn't be exposed in this situation.
With its initial charge failed, the Rhino recoils and positions itself, and more importantly its horn, for a charge. The full-force charge hits its mark, and the horn puts the would-be chubby assassin down for good. In a strictly land battle, Hippos are not agile or armored enough to take on tanks like Rhinos.
If you enjoyed this face-off, then you'll love my other hypothetical battles. Should you fancy a mythical battle, check out who comes out on top in the battle of Wyverns vs Dragons. But if you'd rather check out a more realistic battle, the Cat vs Opossum battle will keep you entertained for hours.
Posted by: Matt Irving on 09/22/2024
